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Monday, October 24, 2016

why my kid is crying (warren edition)


OHHHHHHHH, Warren.



Is he not the cutest little thing? He is so lucky he's cute. Never has a child challenged me to control my inner rage like this guy. **Please tell me I'm not the only mom who knows about inner rage.** Thankfully, at the end of the day he always finds a way to remind me how fiercely I love him (or maybe Jesus does that??) and how poorly I handle things...and all is good again. Often I think about how interesting it will be if Warren has a Warren someday and calls me with his Warren stories. And by interesting I mean ironic and hilarious because I can just say YEAH, I KNOW. So, for the sake of laughing at the stuff that makes me insane and also chronicling this for future Warren, I present to you: WHY MY KID IS CRYING. And keep in mind, he's three. Enough said.
  • Because I'm holding the banana he asked me to hold 
  • Because he "ran out of walks" (one of his favorite things to say) and we haven't even made it to the end of the driveway
  • Because I'm driving too fast and he doesn't like fast (Note: I'm driving 24mph)
  • Because he begged me for eleventy million hours for popcorn and then I gave it to him but he wanted it NOT POPPED.
  • Because I wouldn't let him wipe me.
  • Because he only has two arms and he needs three.
  • Because he hasn't had a birthday in years
  • Because the leaf he wanted to bring home from the park was just.too.heavy. for him to carry to the car
And that was only Tuesday.